Dan and Em's Blog

In my defense, it wasn’t the kind of test I could have studied for.  I’m usually very good at taking tests.  But, as it turns out, I wasn’t so good with the gestational glucose test.  My results weren’t terrible — 2 of the 4 test results were too high.  So, I was referred to an endocrinologist.  I went to see him and I was given a diet to follow and a blood testing meter, like a real diabetic person.  I have to stick my finger and check my blood with a glucose meter.  Although I still wince every time I push the trigger to make the needle stick my finger, I have to say, it’s not nearly as bad as I feared.  It’s not a big deal.  The conclusion I’ve come to is this: if someone had told me prior to pregnancy that this was going to happen to me, I would have gotten pregnant anyway.  It would not have even made me consider making another decision.  In the scale of what I’m experiencing, it’s nearly irrelevant.  It’s one of the smaller sacrifices I will make for my child.  Of course, it would have been better if I had passed my test.

I’ve been testing my blood sugar 4 times a day.  For each time I’m supposed to test my blood sugar, I have a goal.  The vast majority of the time, my results seem to be ok, except sometimes first thing in the morning, and when I eat stuff I know I shouldn’t really be eating.

So far, I’ve determined I can’t eat Belgian waffles with cherries and whipped cream.  Shocking.

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Today is, kind of, my first mother’s day.  I’m definitely someone’s mother, but he hasn’t been born yet.  So, it kind of counts.

The experience of being pregnant has given me a whole new appreciation for my own mother, and for all mothers (but mine in particular).  Being pregnant is hard work.  Physically, it’s very difficult.  Emotionally, it’s a wild ride, too.  Giving birth is going to be even harder, both physically and emotionally.  But really, that’s very small in comparison to everything else it means to be a mother.  It means truly committing to put yourself aside for someone else — forever.  I’m not trying to say that I’m going to give my life up completely when my baby is born.  I’m still going to be who I am.  I’m still going to pursue my dreams, follow my passions.  But there’s no doubt that the priorities have changed, in a very fundamental way.

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It’s like Klennex.  Who knew?

Registering for baby stuff is quite an experience.  I have never in my life had to shop for so many things about which I know so little.  The only thing I can remotely compare it to is when I went shopping for what I would need to go to college.  And at least the school provided a suggested list (which I based most of my decisions on).  Also, everything I was going to take to college had to fit in one car with myself and my family, so there was a finite limit on space.  Everything we need for the baby just needs to fit in our house.  And some people will just suggest we get a bigger house.

There are so many possibilities and options in terms of baby items.  Everyone you talk to has a different suggested list on what you should purchase for your baby.  Each list varies greatly in size, suggestions and cost.  Some lists swear by certain brands, which may be taboo on other lists.  If you look at a suggested list from a baby store, you’ll get really scared.  There are certain things you know you need to have.  Like a car seat.  And a crib, cradle or other place for baby to sleep (unless you’re planning on co-sleeping, and I’m not getting into that).  And maybe a stroller.  Beyond that, almost everything else is less clear.

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So, today, I went for my 3 hour fasting gestational glucose test.  Oh, what fun.  I spent about four fun-filled hours at the Reston Hospital Center.  I got 7 needle pricks in my arms, and I am so very tired.

Overall, other than being really bored, it wasn’t too terribly bad.  I had to refrain from eating anything after midnight last night (not so hard, considering I was sleeping most of that time) and then be at the hospital before 8:00 this morning.  After a strangely long time spent waiting to sign in, we got the process started.  I had to give a urine sample (something which, as a pregnant woman, I’ve gotten very used to) and then give a fasting glucose blood sample.  (As a side note, I’ve always found it strange that they call it “giving” a blood sample — I’d say they “take” it).  Then, it was time for the glucose drink.  The 50 mg drink that I had last week for my first test was ok.  It tasted pretty much like orange Hi-C.  This stuff was much worse.  Still, not awful, but not good.  It was lemon lime flavor, and much, much sweeter than the orange drink from last week.  This had the sweetness and consistency of maple syrup, but with a flat soda taste.  Lovely.  As advice for anyone anticipating their test, you have a full 5 minutes to complete your drink.  I was under the impression I had to down it as quickly as possible, and although that got the experience over more quickly, I don’t think it did anything for my enjoyment of the drink.

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Dan & I recently attended a birthing class at Reston Hospital.  It was a truly excellent experience, and I recommend it.  For someone like me, it was especially helpful: I’m the kind of person who is comforted by facts and statistics.  We learned a lot about exactly how labor progresses, why someone would need a c-section, pregnancy complications, lamaze breathing, what to bring to the hospital, different kinds of pain relief, what to expect after birth, and lots of other stuff.  We also had a visit from an excellent pediatrician (funny guy), from a lactation consultant (who reassured us that most of us won’t even need her services) and representative from cord blood bank (informative, but definitely one sided).

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. . . one to go.  It amazes me how quickly the time has flown, how much there has been to do, and how much there still is to do (with so little time left to do it in)!

We’re having a boy, which was a surprise to me.  Somewhere in my heart & mind, I think I really believed we were having a girl.  I don’t know why — maybe because I’m the oldest in my family, and I’m a girl.  When the doctor told us we’re having a boy, I was truly amazed.  It took me about a week to get used to the idea.  Now that I’m completely enthusiastic about the idea of having a little boy, we’re left with another problem – his name!  We had a name all picked out for a baby girl, but we don’t really have one selected for a boy.  For now, he’ll continue to be Fang to me.

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Well, yes, I’ve already posted about the fact that I will be having a baby.  But last Monday, I got to see the baby for the first time, making it that much more real.  We had our first visual ultrasound on Monday, as a part of a pre-natal screening test.  The test results were normal, but as wonderful as it was to have that worry lifted from me, it was small in comparison to the experience of watching my unborn child move.  The baby is still too small to distinguish gender, or to see fingers and toes (that will come later) but we saw two arms, two legs, a head, and the rest of the body.  More exciting than seeing the baby was seeing the movement.  Apparently, I’m having a kickboxing baby.  The baby moved pretty consistently throughout the scan.  I still can’t feel the movement, but it was truly amazing to see that movement and to realize it was happening “real time” inside of me.

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I am truly on the cusp of something life changing.  My life is about to undergo a shift unlike any I’ve ever experienced — truly the biggest thing that has ever happened to me in my life.  Dan & I are expecting our first child in July.

We heard the baby’s heartbeat for the first time about a week ago (on New Year’s Eve) so now I feel like it’s real.  I’m full of a huge range of emotions.  I feel excited, nervous, overwhelmed, worried, tired.  It’s something that we both wanted very much, but now that it’s happened, it’s a little scary.  We have that whole, “what did we just get ourselves into” feeling going on.

I suspect that over the coming weeks and months this is going to become a larger and larger focus for my blogging — how can it not, as it becomes a larger and larger part of my life?  It’s such a wonderful adventure, and I’m very much looking forward to it.  But it amazes me, every day, how little I know and how unprepared I feel as I go along.  As someone who truly feels called to teach, it’s exciting on a whole extra level – this new person will be a product of me and my perspective in a way that makes me reexamine a lot of what I think.  But it’s wonderful, exciting and fantastic, and I know it will be a great experience.